Practices for A Successful Career Transition For Women Lawyers
Career Transition: How to get hired, re-hired after a leave, making a career move.
Last week I was delighted to be on a panel for an Ontario Bar Association Women Lawyers Forum Program entitled Career Management: Pressing Issues at the Forefront. This is an updated version of the handout I prepared for the OBA Program – I have added links to it for ease of use - and it is the blog post that I promised to prepare for those who so kindly filled out the survey I created to help me prepare for the program (thank you!)
These are all practices I use myself and recommend to my clients, whether in a transition or not, frankly, in most cases. They are tried and true. I am not a career coach per se - my expertise is in supporting professional women to be connected deeply to themselves, self-confident, and purposeful, so the practices reflect that perspective. They will be supportive to you in then being able to have the clarity and confidence to access the skills and support you need to make your career transition successfully.
These practices are inter-related. Pick one or two and focus on them first. I have called them practices because it is about practicing and making progress over time. We are building muscles here.
1. Practice self-compassion – three elements: self-kindness, mindfulness, common humanity – see Self-Compassion by Kristen Neff
Be aware that this career transition can be very, very tender… there are issues around financial security, status, a sense of belonging, a sense of contribution, and more. You can also have issues of identity, which can run really deep - about being a lawyer, or not being a lawyer if you’re transitioning out of law as I did. Try to be aware and be self-compassionate around this… notice when you are in judgment and reconnect with your passion and purpose for what you are trying to achieve. Connect to your “Big Why”. Connect to your values.
In a career transition, we can be very self-critical and plagued with self-doubt; change can feel scary; there’s a part of you that is your inner critic (aka gremlin) who doesn’t want you to change, so can be a source of constant self-criticism… can feel like imposter syndrome. You can work to manage this – there are tools… we need to find courage and get out of own way here!
Turn toward your fears and your negative emotions rather than away from them: all emotions are important date to take into consideration – we want to learn how to navigate them and tune into their wisdom rather than turning away.
Access the many resources at Kristen Neff’s site self-compassion.org.
2. Practice taking good care of yourself! Eat, Sleep, Exercise, have some FUN, find access to JOY!
Have a daily practice of connecting to your body, even if just for a few minutes… don’t be a perfectionist about this. Don’t be all or nothing… e.g. meditate (drop awareness into your body), do a short yoga practice; walk outside in nature; take three minutes and dance to one song (Try This is Me by Keala Settle; Born This Way by Lady Gaga).
3. Practice authentic confidence - learn how to show more of yourself, be visible, be present with people.
Work to create some habits and rituals that help you follow wisdom in The Confidence Code by Katy Kay and Claire Shipman: Think Less. Take Action. Be Authentic – many of practices will help you with this one.
Be authentic – leverage your strengths – take the free VIA Character Strengths Assessment at viacharacter.org.
Use power poses to connect – see Amy Cuddy’s Ted Talk.
Apply for jobs where you don’t meet 100% of the qualifications (men do this all the time!) - get comfortable with being a bit uncomfortable.
4. Practice being “gritty” to create meaningful success for yourself (grit = passion and perseverance toward long term goals).
Where are you on the Grit Scale?
Grit can be grown – read Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance by Angela Duckworth.
Connect to and build your passion.
Combination of your interest and your sense of purpose (the spirit part of “body, mind and spirit”).
Build your perseverance.
With deliberate practice – e.g. do an interview, reflect on it after – what am I learning, what could I do better next time?
5. Practice gratitude, which helps create well-being/happiness.
Happiness/well-being are key to success (not other way around).
Have a daily gratitude practice – science backs this up – see my blog post Appreciating the Power of Gratitude.
Helps you get perspective when struggling with self-criticism.
6. Practice empowered reflection, not rumination (spinning in your head). We learn through a cycle of action and reflection.
Get a journal and note your progress; e.g. what went well and why, today? (Which is also a gratitude practice and can be part of deliberate practice for grit above.)
Use the journal to step into growth mindset and ask this powerful question: what are the opportunities in the challenges I am facing??
Be honest with yourself as you reflect: What do you really yearn for: in terms of your life; in terms of your professional contribution?
7. Practice excellence, not perfection, especially in a career transition!
Getting hired is not about perfectionism… it’s not about getting all the commas right in a document… it’s a very different skill set from much of the practice of law (which should be about excellence too, actually) – it’s about relationship, it’s about knowing how to show up in your authenticity and your excitement for the opportunity, knowing that you don’t have to be perfect and that people will wonder if you don’t allow any vulnerability to show - they are not going to feel like they see you. Vulnerability creates connection. (See Brené Brown’s Ted Talk on this.)
Being in a growth mindset helps us move into excellence.
8. Practice being a creator, not a victim of your circumstances – take radical responsibility for your life - leverage growth mindset:
Find the opportunity in the challenge of the career transition – for fulfilling work – refer to empowered reflection practice above.
Growth mindset is also an element of grit – see above.
9. Practice normalizing and depersonalizing what you are experiencing.
It’s normal to feel stress in this career transition… opportunity to reframe your relationship with stress – we feel stress when we care about something; can’t have a meaningful life without stress. The Upside of Stress by Kelly McGonigal and her Ted Talk.
Part of self-compassion (common humanity).
Know that women tend to undervalue themselves – get some support to anchor into the value you do provide – have someone hold up the mirror.
Research shows women negotiate just as well as men when negotiating on behalf of others – how can you leverage this?
10. Practice reaching out for the support you need to grow and learn and find fulfilling work – asking for help is a sign of strength not weakness; you are not alone and there are people who like to help, especially when you ask for help from a place of being connected to your confidence and your sense of purpose.
Notice what gaps you have in skills and experience, but always from place of confidence and purpose.
Get help with your resumé from people who interview others, preferably lawyers… ask them what they look for.
Like with the resumé example, you’re magnetic when connected to your purpose and passion - the support and synchronicities happen.
Remember, it’s never too late to Make Room For YOU!Please do reach out if you have questions, comments or insights about career transition you want to share. I would love to hear from you - milisa@milisaburns.com.
warmly, Milisa
